Last week Cheesehead noted a decline in blog activity and the responses to her post confirm that many one-time enthusiasts are neglecting their blogs these days, though none of them seem to be glad about this.
And, of course, I'm in the same boat.
Despite my best intentions, regular blogging just doesn't seem to be happening.
Mostly, it's not a question of disinclination, or even of blogger's block - it's simply that I'm too. darned. busy. to do the sort of thinking that needs to happen to enable any blogging worth reading.
I'm more than a little embarassed by this.
After all, back in the carefree days of curacy (!), I managed to fill my days pretty convincingly, and rarely felt that I was short of things to do, - but somehow along the way there was always time to pause, to notice what God might be up to, to dig out the right quotation, to hunt the right image. and then to indulge in a little thinking aloud.
Now, though there is every reason to suppose that God is just as busy about the place, I seem to be too intent on galloping from pillar to post to actually reflect on this. That wouldn't matter too much if it was just the blog that was suffering - but of course, it's not. If I'm not reflecting here, I'm perilously close to not reflecting anywhere (the more so in the absence of WonderfulVicar and theological son to ramble to) - and that is positively dangerous.
It would be oh so easy to just pull the plug on this blog here and now. I could stop feeling guilty about my neglect of it, stop comparing my current contributions with the meatier posts of former days...So many of the things I might like to blog about are potentially complicated, and might cause distress close to home if misunderstood...while too much of my time is taken up with doing highly uninspiring things like...signing forms approving headstones, for example!
And yet...And yet...
While tweeting deals with my need to connect with the world beyond the parish, it doesn't constrain me to reflect on what is actually going on with God, these people, this place...or, of course, with me as I continue to try to fathom what being the priest for these parishes really means.
And there's the risk that if I don't look at it here, I may not do so anywhere,that I might have the experience and miss the meaning.
So, somehow, I need to return to the discipline of fairly regular blogging....
I'm not entirely sure where I might find the time for it, but there is simply no point in becoming a relentless activist...so much NOT what I was ordained for.
So, I need to have the courage to do my thinking aloud when I can safely do so...but I need to remember, always, that there are people reading my words whose stories, too, are played out against this backdrop, people whom I'm called to serve, people who are part of the reason I'm here at all.
Cheesehead's post has spawned a lot of reflection among our little blogging community, hasn't it?
ReplyDelete(((you)))
I hope you find a good balance for this.
ReplyDeleteI need to reflect, too, and I do find that blogging makes it a bit easier. I guess I'm a bit of a feedback junkie, always pleased when I get some comments, always a bit happier to write for an audience than to a piece of paper. Despite that I'm very behind on all sorts of blogging at the moment!
I like reading your blog, and I'm glad you're committed to continuing to write here, whatever the reasons.
Your blog is really helpful and encouraging Kathryn. Please don't stop. Once a week would be fab, once a fortnight great. Most of the stuff I would love to reflect on cannot be done out loud without being misinterpretted by those I care about.
ReplyDeleteI have gained much from blogging, widened horizons, several new friends, new ideas..
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of blogging, for me - unlike you, I think, Kathryn, my old blog (saddly left behind) was less about careful writing and more about half thought through maybe-ideas that I wanted to talk with folk about
but then I wanted get myself heard, wanted my clever ideas listened to... and it started to become hard work, less conversational and less fun
but I would still locate blogs as one of the three most important human inputs into my spiritual life, and sometimes I feel guilty that I don't contribute to it but just draw on others like you...
I wonder if we're getting to a core of bloggers who have a vision (calling) to see this a central rather than periphery part of their lives?
Although I skipped a few days recently, I continue to keep up with blogging mostly because it presses me to write, and when I am writing, I am in touch with deeper things. I like it for that.
ReplyDeleteAnd I love it for bringing you into my life.
Thanks for that..... I have managed to keep up daily for a few months (although sometimes they may be written and 'batched' late at night...) for precisely these reasons. Once I stop carving out space for 'reflecting' I stop being what I was ordained for.
ReplyDeleteI remember a minister when I started who said that sometimes he didn't have time for sermon prep until 5am on Sunday morning. I wondered how he expected his congregations to take what he said seriously or to read their Bibles like it meant something... (I wondered- I did not say- far too polite...).
Thanks for this reflection- it helped me!
Graham,
ReplyDeleteI think I could take sermons written at 5am on Sunday morning very seriously indeed! While I value reflection and I do believe it is important for ministers (ordained or not) to take the time to reflect and to listen to God, I think other pastoral responsibilities can and should take precedence at times -- and if that means the sermon gets left until the last minute, so be it.
My own working life is such that I have a lot of "discretionary" time where I must decide what to do next, from a seemingly endless list of tasks. It isn't always easy to do this and I don't think there are any one-size-fits-all solutions.
Yes my own encouragement to keep going Kathryn, even if it's just a link to something you've read somewhere else. I do feel a part of a little community of people I've never met through doing this so be encouraged.
ReplyDeleteWord verification = jockkeye. Scottish conjunctivitis?