Come to me Homily Trinity 10A

One of the hardest things in life for many of us is admitting when we need help.

I’ve found myself playing games around the question with some really silly things

“”No – it’s fine – I can MANAGE”….through gritted teeth just a few seconds before dropping a bit of furniture that only misses my toes by inches…

I’ve caught myself in the same games around more important things too. When my parents died just as I left school, I didn’t let on to anyone that I didn’t have enough money to survive while their back account was frozen as the solicitors did their thing. I know now, as the parent of adult children, that my parents friends would have been devastated to know I was struggling and hadn’t asked for help...but for me, it was really important to be seen to be coping. Even if I wasn’t. Even if that was a lie. It’s fine. I can manage.

I like to claim that its because I “don’t want to be a bother” - which sonds kind of well-mannered and self-effacing...but in reality I suspect there’s more than a grain of arrogant independence involved. And that’smy choice, but it’s a choice that may have an impact on my daily life and my relationship with friends, colleagues and family. What would have happened if Abraham’s servant had been too busy being independent to accept the offer of water from Rebekah…? Would he ever have found the bride he had gone to seek?

We don’t know.

What we DO know is that when we try the “go it alone” approach in our relationship with God, it’s positively dangerous. God made us for relationship with God...and since all that is good and wonderful comes as God’s gift, we condemn ourselves to a deprivatation that is both unnecessary and terribly terribly painful if we turn away “It’s alright. I can manage”

That determination to be independent is one of the greatest barriers that prevents us from accepting all that God offers...I think that’s part of why Jesus so often uses children to remind us of how we’re to live in God’s kingdom. Children may be gradually learning the ways of independence, but to start with at least they simply can’t survive if left alone. And though they do have that survival instinct that makes them insist on “me first “ til they’ve learned better, they don’t on the whole worry about how they look to others...they aren’t worried about being judged weak or inadequate if they accept whatever help is on offer.

They don’t trip over their own egos whenever they try to take a step towards God.

And we are, famously, invited to become like a child...to set aside anything that prevents us from recognising and rejoicing in our dependence on God.

Listen to the invitation Jesus offers

"Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 11:30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

That’s what is SAYS –But when I picture Jesus carrying a burden, what I actually SEE in my mind’s eye is Jesus carrying the cross itself...struggling, falling….So it’s hard to understand this invitation to share the weight of his burden, when he seems to call it LIGHT

And yet, even though I don’t understand it, nonetheless Jesus insists “Carry my burden instead of yours. It’s easier”…

So – what are my burdens, if the cross itself would be lighter? What things weary me week by week? What wearies you?

I thought about that for a bit, and came to realise that many of the burdens I carry are weights I place on myself. Nobody out there expects me to be a kind of super-priest and super-mum, available 24/7 in an immaculate home offering wonderful hospitality and comfort to all in need...but every now and then I behave as if that’s what God has asked of me – and get really ratty when I realise how far short I’m falling.

You’ll have different burdens that weary you – but it’s worth thinking about whether any of them are self imposed and self created...Do you just ask too much of yourself, and then beat yourself up when you fail?

That’s never God’s way. God doesn’t want you to be perfect. God wants you to be real.

Then, besides our self inflicted burdens, Society burdens us too…

There are expectations that we’ll all aspire to particular ways of living…that we’ll want to model our family lives on the glossy illusions offered us by the media…that our children will be miserable if they don’t have the latest must-have toy, that we’re all complete failures if we don’t manage a week in the sun on holiday every year

Those kind of aspirations have a cost in both financial and human terms…they weigh heavy…If you succeed, there is pressure to continue to be successful. If you fail, that failure is a weight of its own.

Come to me, all you that are weary and heavy laden…

we need not carry those burdens…they don’t really belong to us unless we choose to adopt them. We can put them down and walk away.

Of course, there ARE other burdens that are ours…burdens that we need to carry. Responsibilities for our loved ones, responsibility to live well, to use the potential that God has given us. Burdens created by a society that doesn’t always do its best for those who might be struggling...burdens of poverty, or ill health. Those weigh very heavy indeed – and I’m afraid that Jesus does not say that he’ll take these burdens from us, but he suggests a better way to bear them.

My yoke is easy

'The underlying Greek word means 'kind.'

My yoke is kind.

A kind yoke is one that is carefully shaped so that there will be a minimum of chafing.

Jesus' yoke will be kind to our shoulders…will enable us to bear our loads without struggle.

I’m told that in Jewish rabbinic tradition, to learn from a particular rabbi was described as “bearing his yoke”…It meant that the pupil would be constantly beside his teacher, walking where he walked, seeing the same views sharing his insights, learning almost to think his thoughts….to live according to his rule of life.

Some rabbis set very demanding targets…a long list of dos and don’ts that wore down their disciples...Their yoke was hard to bear, and their disciples stumbled and fell.

The yoke that Jesus offers, the one he bears himself, is very different.

In place of rules that we might fail to keep, we are given grace in abundance…More, Jesus invites us to become his yoke mates, joined in a team with him.

We can learn how to pull our load by working beside him and watching how he does it. The heavy labour will seem lighter…

Yoked with Christ, we are enabled to choose the good and to refrain from the evil and we discover that there is no freedom greater than that of walking each day beside our servant King.

Nobody needs to go it alone!