(Click on the image to enlarge)The sign reads "Keep Clear". Hadn't planned on doing much else, if I'm honest.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Glimpse of the blindingly obvious?
(Click on the image to enlarge)The sign reads "Keep Clear". Hadn't planned on doing much else, if I'm honest.
After a shaky start
the day was rescued in style by young Dufflepud (on his half-term break), with whom the dogs and I enjoyed a splendid expedition to discover the Severn flood-plane in and around Deerhurst.It was a beautiful spring-like day which made it very hard to believe that the last walk we'd taken together had been through a blizzard, though the flooded meadows told another story, and we frequently found the road ahead under water.
I'd actually forgotten how beautiful this part of the world can be,- we had a wonderful time, but only travelled 50 miles round trip from home, (just a few miles more than the normal school run) . Really good to relax together.Somehow, that just doesn't happen enough.
Ouch!
The amazing Dave does it again...(sometimes I wish he wouldn't)
Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.
Oh my friends, and readers, thank you all for showing love and friendship, care and support to the person I am.
Hugs all round, and may your Valentine's day be full of love wherever you look for it.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Ms Average confronts reality
Just home from the "Speed Awareness" course I was offered as an alternative to nasty points on my licence...and very interesting, if sobering, it was too.
I was absolutely "average" in every area of the tests we were given, which pretty much supports my view that I drive safely but unimaginatively,-.and tend to have "better things" to think about along the way. I was appalled by how intensely I concentrated on video "hazard perception" tests (after 3o minutes I emerged with knuckles white and blood pressure raised) in contrast to the way I concentrate when I'm driving for real.I've thought of driving time, with some pleasure, as my space to consider God, life, everything...but maybe not the road.
Even more appalled by the demonstrations of the damage wrought at assorted speeds. At the 33mph for which I was booked, the poor dummy was carried for several metres on the bonnet of the car...Once speeds exceeded 40, it was so unfunny that I'm not going to write about it - but if you were behind me on the A40 this evening as I came home, I'm sorry if you were bored, but truly, that was the fastest I could morally manage.
Every now and then (or possibly more often than that) its good to remember how dangerous cars really are.
Please, oh lovely people about whom I care, drive carefully.
I was absolutely "average" in every area of the tests we were given, which pretty much supports my view that I drive safely but unimaginatively,-.and tend to have "better things" to think about along the way. I was appalled by how intensely I concentrated on video "hazard perception" tests (after 3o minutes I emerged with knuckles white and blood pressure raised) in contrast to the way I concentrate when I'm driving for real.I've thought of driving time, with some pleasure, as my space to consider God, life, everything...but maybe not the road.
Even more appalled by the demonstrations of the damage wrought at assorted speeds. At the 33mph for which I was booked, the poor dummy was carried for several metres on the bonnet of the car...Once speeds exceeded 40, it was so unfunny that I'm not going to write about it - but if you were behind me on the A40 this evening as I came home, I'm sorry if you were bored, but truly, that was the fastest I could morally manage.
Every now and then (or possibly more often than that) its good to remember how dangerous cars really are.
Please, oh lovely people about whom I care, drive carefully.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Humph revisited
What alot of lovely people seem to read this blog! Thank you for your supportive messages.
I've been considering last night's experience a bit more, - and I think that actually the family were within their rights as observant RCs, even though it hurt.
For them, it mattered hugely that the Last Rites were conducted by an RC priest.
For them, the sacramental process would not have been complete if it had been conducted by someone who, in their terms, was not a priest at all.
As we all know, a sacrament is "an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace" - in this case, the grace of God at work forgiving and welcoming the departed soul.
That will, I'd say, happen regardless of who offers what prayers at the time of death.
So, my role as a priest is to make that process explicit ...naming God, if you like, claiming the ground, reminding everyone of what is actually going on.
And the family, in this case, is already aware of God's involvement,-.so my ministry becomes important mainly as a signifier...but if for them it doesn't carry that significance, then there's no point in thinking wistfully that it ought to. It won't.
Sacraments are effective signs of God's grace at work, they lose their impact if they dont actually point to that for the recipient.
As to the disruptive influence of vibrating phones, unfortunately the relief chaplain only gets called out "out of hours" if there is a huge emergency...so immediate response is part of the deal. We have to agree to be there within the hour, so need to pick up as soon as the call comes in. If it's less urgent, then it waits till the full-time chaplains are on again.
This means we only get the life or death issues - huge responsibility, huge sense of frustration when you cannot meet the need.
But not being able to meet needs is a painful but pressing reality...
I did say I was learning on the job, didn't I?
I've been considering last night's experience a bit more, - and I think that actually the family were within their rights as observant RCs, even though it hurt.
For them, it mattered hugely that the Last Rites were conducted by an RC priest.
For them, the sacramental process would not have been complete if it had been conducted by someone who, in their terms, was not a priest at all.
As we all know, a sacrament is "an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace" - in this case, the grace of God at work forgiving and welcoming the departed soul.
That will, I'd say, happen regardless of who offers what prayers at the time of death.
So, my role as a priest is to make that process explicit ...naming God, if you like, claiming the ground, reminding everyone of what is actually going on.
And the family, in this case, is already aware of God's involvement,-.so my ministry becomes important mainly as a signifier...but if for them it doesn't carry that significance, then there's no point in thinking wistfully that it ought to. It won't.
Sacraments are effective signs of God's grace at work, they lose their impact if they dont actually point to that for the recipient.
As to the disruptive influence of vibrating phones, unfortunately the relief chaplain only gets called out "out of hours" if there is a huge emergency...so immediate response is part of the deal. We have to agree to be there within the hour, so need to pick up as soon as the call comes in. If it's less urgent, then it waits till the full-time chaplains are on again.
This means we only get the life or death issues - huge responsibility, huge sense of frustration when you cannot meet the need.
But not being able to meet needs is a painful but pressing reality...
I did say I was learning on the job, didn't I?
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Humph
This weekend, I've been on call as "Duty Chaplain" for the 3 local hospitals, a ministry I really enjoy. It's the first time my cover has included a Sunday, so I was a bit nervous that a call might come during the 8.00 Eucharist, when I'm the only person present who can actually preside,- but with that hurdle cleared, I was pretty relaxed about the rest of the day.
Still, it was with a little disquiet that I felt my cassock pocket vibrate gently just as the choir began the Magnificat during Evensong. I was preaching, and it seemed a bit tough to just dump my script on WonderfulVicar and bolt. Instead, I made a reasonably discreet exit to the vestry and picked up the call. Someone had just died and the family were requesting a priest.
Would they be alright to hang on 40 minutes, to allow me to finish Evensong and get to the hospital?
No problem...so I went back into the service, though a little distracted, and trying to offer prayers for the lady, E, and her family. Sermon time arrived, and I mounted the pulpit steps...only that wretched pocket was buzzing again(thank heaven for the "silent" setting). Nothing to be done at this point but continue, though concentration was a real struggle. I'm told that I no less coherent than normal, but inside I was wondering if this was a follow-up to the first call, or another call out..and if so to which hospital. I hated the fact that I couldn't answer instantly, be the kind of "flying squad" chaplain that all my instincts prompted me to be...And I hated too the fact that I was less than present to my congregation at St M's.
As soon as the sermon was over, WonderfulVicar mouthed that I should just go,- so, pausing only to pick up the oil stock, I prepared to do just that. Only the second call turned out to relate to the same case. No need for me to turn out after all. The family are RC and if they can't have an RC priest then at the very least they want a man.
It's not unreasonable, really,- but I am, once again, surprised at how much I mind when gender gets in the way of ministry.
Those phonecalls prevented me from being properly "there" for my own congregation, and now my gender has prevented me from offering ministry at the hospital too.
And it's not a good feeling.
Not in any way.
Still, it was with a little disquiet that I felt my cassock pocket vibrate gently just as the choir began the Magnificat during Evensong. I was preaching, and it seemed a bit tough to just dump my script on WonderfulVicar and bolt. Instead, I made a reasonably discreet exit to the vestry and picked up the call. Someone had just died and the family were requesting a priest.
Would they be alright to hang on 40 minutes, to allow me to finish Evensong and get to the hospital?
No problem...so I went back into the service, though a little distracted, and trying to offer prayers for the lady, E, and her family. Sermon time arrived, and I mounted the pulpit steps...only that wretched pocket was buzzing again(thank heaven for the "silent" setting). Nothing to be done at this point but continue, though concentration was a real struggle. I'm told that I no less coherent than normal, but inside I was wondering if this was a follow-up to the first call, or another call out..and if so to which hospital. I hated the fact that I couldn't answer instantly, be the kind of "flying squad" chaplain that all my instincts prompted me to be...And I hated too the fact that I was less than present to my congregation at St M's.
As soon as the sermon was over, WonderfulVicar mouthed that I should just go,- so, pausing only to pick up the oil stock, I prepared to do just that. Only the second call turned out to relate to the same case. No need for me to turn out after all. The family are RC and if they can't have an RC priest then at the very least they want a man.
It's not unreasonable, really,- but I am, once again, surprised at how much I mind when gender gets in the way of ministry.
Those phonecalls prevented me from being properly "there" for my own congregation, and now my gender has prevented me from offering ministry at the hospital too.
And it's not a good feeling.
Not in any way.
I'm very much afraid it's true!
Found this while looking for a picture for the previous post, and am presenting my rating in only slightly flippant mode. It didn't take long yesterday for me to realise that Sloth is indeed the besetting sin of this particular ENFP. Procrastination and a dislike of closure? Mmmnnn...that's the one.
David explained that it typically features a refusal to grapple with the situation that confronts us, becuase it is too difficult, too confrontational...so we move on, appearing restless, even energetic, but always refusing to engage, to acknowledge that it is in this situation, here and now, that we will find God.
So..no surprise at my scores!
Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz
David explained that it typically features a refusal to grapple with the situation that confronts us, becuase it is too difficult, too confrontational...so we move on, appearing restless, even energetic, but always refusing to engage, to acknowledge that it is in this situation, here and now, that we will find God.
So..no surprise at my scores!
| Greed: | Low | |
| Gluttony: | Medium | |
| Wrath: | Very Low | |
| Sloth: | High | |
| Envy: | Low | |
| Lust: | Very Low | |
| Pride: | Low |
Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz
In which the Curate learns all about sin!
Predictably wonderful CME yesterday from super-hero Canon David Hoyle whose excellence I've celebrated before. When he preached at St M’s last autumn I made him cringe during my welcome by saying that I’d never yet heard him utter a disappointing word,- but I only said it because it’s true!
So, yesterday we had to do some serious thinking about an area that tends to be skirted round by the inclusive, liberal church in which I’d place myself at home.
Sin
We were alerted to the contemporary tendency to see sin as just a species of psychological malaise. In pastoral encounters, I know I tend to speak about “brokenness” and “failure” rather than “sin”. Is this just because of a culture that equates sin with either the sex scandals of the tabloid press or an over-indulgence in chocolate (a la Slimming World, which apparently allows you up to 10 “sins”, - calorific, high point foods,- per day)? Or is it because I’m so embroiled by the outlook that celebrates self “Because I’m worth it”.
It’s a culture founded, in the final analysis, on the sin that inverts the proper order of creation, to make human beings the measure of all things, the centre of the universe.
If worship is an expression of the right order of things, then sin is its antithesis. Instead of God on the throne, there’s self…
Even as I try to speak of an alternative route, I’m held captive by the prevailing mind-set. I want to emphasise the overwhelming love of God, particularly in a context in which fear might seem to have been the foundation of worship for too long…but perhaps I do this at the expense of confronting the reality of my own sin.
Sin, we learned, is a mismatch, a disappointment of expectation, a negation of the selves that we should be in Christ.
It is a behavioural choice,- to select a lesser good above a greater, which will in its turn lead to a distortion of other relationships, so that everything becomes disordered, inappropriate. We are satisfied with a secondary treasure , and are gradually shaped by that choice, travelling ever further from the true selves we are called to be in Christ.
DH was terribly clear in his demonstration that sin is parasitic upon a corresponding virtue. Too often, this is what makes it seem attractive. Thus pride presents itself as humility. As we say “Lord, I am not worthy…” we are bidding for attention, placing ourselves centre-stage “ Look at me, being humble. Don’t I do it nicely?!”
“Once in a saintly passion
I cried with desperate grief
“O Lord, my heart is black with guilt
Of sinners I am chief.
Then stopped my guardian angel
And whispered from behind
“Vanity, my little man
You’re nothing of the kind” (from E.G.Rupp "Luther's Progress")
Avarice and gluttony both arise from a failure to trust in God’s provision…instead, we set about providing for ourselves, asserting our self-dependence rather than accepting that God will give us all we need and more than we can imagine
“It is God’s good pleasure to give us the Kingdom, but all we pray for is a holiday or a new car”
What’s more, we set out to acquire them, pursuing our goals relentlessly, till we are consumed by the process, the appetite, and lose ourselves utterly. DH quoted one example from The Great Divorce, of a woman who has grumbled for so long that she has become nothing but a grumble…but I came home thinking of another scene from the same book,- the process by which the dwarf (the true self) is swallowed gradually by the posturing Tragedian …
I wondered, as I drove home, whether in fact all sins are derivatives of pride, since they seem ultimately to involve putting our own kingdom, our own fulfillment in the place of God. David ended the afternoon by pointing out that when we are called to life in all its fulness, that is not to the apotheosis of Kathryn-ness, but to a Kathryn who is fully human in Christ.
(Michael at feig-city has also posted about the day...David is so good at making us think)
Finished!
One adequate, if not inspired Evensong sermon on our responsibility for creation.
In the course of preparing it, I found an article by susperstar Walter ("The Powers") Wink . There was so much good stuff, I ended up wanting to write an essay myself...
I'll spare you that, but in a week in which I've been specially conscious of the natural world and the extremes of climate, I loved these words.
We unite to struggle together for ecojustice. But we are motivated to do so, not just because we are terrified of the consequences of ecodisaster, though that does indeed terrify and motivate us. Nor are we motivated solely by the demand of the gospel, with its challenge to all domination. Nor are we motivated simply by a hunger and thirst after justice for all God's creatures, though all these are factors.
More deeply, we are motivated by our hunger for God. For as Thomas Berry puts it, when we destroy the living forms of this planet, the first consequence is that we destroy modes of Divine presence. "If we have a wonderful sense of the divine, it is because we live amid such awesome magnificence. If we have refinement of emotion and sensitivity, it is because of the delicacy, the fragrance, and the indescribable beauty of soul and music and rhythmic movement in the world about us."28 Our very gusto for living, the joy that satisfies us and blesses our days, are largely a function of the sheer beauty and abundance of nature. We are already beginning to feel the loss as fewer songbirds greet us with the dawn. When we degrade the environment, we deprive ourselves of the most powerful and constant revelation of the Divine itself. When we diminish nature, we diminish the ecstasy and sheer happiness of dwelling on this solitary and incomparable earth. When we damage this intricate and vulnerable creation, we must reckon with a consequent loss in the thrill of being a creature.
It appears that God is not a remote deity external to the universe, but is present in every energy-event of spirit-matter. In the final analysis, then, we struggle for ecojustice because we are deliriously in love with God's body, this greening and vivid earth.
In the course of preparing it, I found an article by susperstar Walter ("The Powers") Wink . There was so much good stuff, I ended up wanting to write an essay myself...
I'll spare you that, but in a week in which I've been specially conscious of the natural world and the extremes of climate, I loved these words.
We unite to struggle together for ecojustice. But we are motivated to do so, not just because we are terrified of the consequences of ecodisaster, though that does indeed terrify and motivate us. Nor are we motivated solely by the demand of the gospel, with its challenge to all domination. Nor are we motivated simply by a hunger and thirst after justice for all God's creatures, though all these are factors.
More deeply, we are motivated by our hunger for God. For as Thomas Berry puts it, when we destroy the living forms of this planet, the first consequence is that we destroy modes of Divine presence. "If we have a wonderful sense of the divine, it is because we live amid such awesome magnificence. If we have refinement of emotion and sensitivity, it is because of the delicacy, the fragrance, and the indescribable beauty of soul and music and rhythmic movement in the world about us."28 Our very gusto for living, the joy that satisfies us and blesses our days, are largely a function of the sheer beauty and abundance of nature. We are already beginning to feel the loss as fewer songbirds greet us with the dawn. When we degrade the environment, we deprive ourselves of the most powerful and constant revelation of the Divine itself. When we diminish nature, we diminish the ecstasy and sheer happiness of dwelling on this solitary and incomparable earth. When we damage this intricate and vulnerable creation, we must reckon with a consequent loss in the thrill of being a creature.
It appears that God is not a remote deity external to the universe, but is present in every energy-event of spirit-matter. In the final analysis, then, we struggle for ecojustice because we are deliriously in love with God's body, this greening and vivid earth.
And indeed, it was very good.
Friday, February 09, 2007
Is this evasion or avoidance?
There are far too many things going on in my life that I'm anxious not to confront right now,- chief among them, of course, being the perennial problem of a sermon for Evensong on Sunday.
I really do struggle with this....the lectionary is often harsh to "Second Service" preachers, and even when the readings are good, I'm often defeated by the dynamics of preaching to a handful of people scattered across the church, while a far larger contingent sits behind me in the choir. This Sunday, actually, the readings are quite attractive if I can only apply myself to them,- but that feels like quite a substantial "if only" at this moment.
So, for the first time for ages I'm going to indulge in the Revgals Friday Five...something very close to bloggers' junk-food, quick and undemanding, which I've resisted successfully so far this year.
Not today, though.
Anything rather than concentrate on the job in hand!
For a once-upon-a-time semi-pro singer, a chance to revisit old dreams was really fun...but there's no obligation on anyone to read the results.
1) If I could sing like anyone, it would be lovely, lovely Emma Kirkby. Once upon a time in Cambridge, I got the chance to sub for her at the final rehearsal before we premiered a new edition of the Mozart Requiem...I love her absolute purity of tone - and she sings the sort of music I love most, and which my own voice, in its heyday, suited best. She's just heaven!
2) I would love to sing the song Dove sono, or come to that Porgi Amor - with a good orchestra. Well, let's be honest, I'd really enjoy the chance to sing the whole of the Contessa role from Marriage of Figaro. It's not going to happen,-and it would not be a musically pleasing event if it did, these days. However, dreams are free!
irl, the stuff I like, I sing all the time,- with more or less success. Public performances are a very different matter.
3) It would be really cool to sing at one of the lovely Wren churches in London. I'm specially fond of St James's Piccadilly, - where I depped as a chorister once or twice in my youth. I was also working just along the road, at Hatchards bookshop at the time, so St James's felt like my weekday parish church...There was a lovely early Eucharist that I could catch before work,- and I think it was then that I began to revolve my life around that particular sacramental pole. Definitely a Good Place (and I've just discovered, while Googling it for this post, that a friend's partner is on the staff there - lucky man!)
4) If I could sing a dream duet it would be with Ian Bostridge. Though I'm not sure I'd be able to make any sound at all, were he in the vicinity.
5) If I could sing on a TV or radio show, it would be...I honestly don't know the answer to this. There isn't an obvious show-case for the sort of singing I'd be likely to be doing...Perhaps I'll settle for one day precenting somewhere whose choir broadcasts on R3's Choral Evensong - assuming that this actually survives.
OK...having indulged in this cheerfully pointless activity, it's back to Genesis 1 and an ecology sermon. Unless, of course, I paint the dog's toe-nails...or rearrange the sock drawer...or...
I really do struggle with this....the lectionary is often harsh to "Second Service" preachers, and even when the readings are good, I'm often defeated by the dynamics of preaching to a handful of people scattered across the church, while a far larger contingent sits behind me in the choir. This Sunday, actually, the readings are quite attractive if I can only apply myself to them,- but that feels like quite a substantial "if only" at this moment.
So, for the first time for ages I'm going to indulge in the Revgals Friday Five...something very close to bloggers' junk-food, quick and undemanding, which I've resisted successfully so far this year.
Not today, though.
Anything rather than concentrate on the job in hand!
For a once-upon-a-time semi-pro singer, a chance to revisit old dreams was really fun...but there's no obligation on anyone to read the results.
1) If I could sing like anyone, it would be lovely, lovely Emma Kirkby. Once upon a time in Cambridge, I got the chance to sub for her at the final rehearsal before we premiered a new edition of the Mozart Requiem...I love her absolute purity of tone - and she sings the sort of music I love most, and which my own voice, in its heyday, suited best. She's just heaven!
2) I would love to sing the song Dove sono, or come to that Porgi Amor - with a good orchestra. Well, let's be honest, I'd really enjoy the chance to sing the whole of the Contessa role from Marriage of Figaro. It's not going to happen,-and it would not be a musically pleasing event if it did, these days. However, dreams are free!
irl, the stuff I like, I sing all the time,- with more or less success. Public performances are a very different matter.
3) It would be really cool to sing at one of the lovely Wren churches in London. I'm specially fond of St James's Piccadilly, - where I depped as a chorister once or twice in my youth. I was also working just along the road, at Hatchards bookshop at the time, so St James's felt like my weekday parish church...There was a lovely early Eucharist that I could catch before work,- and I think it was then that I began to revolve my life around that particular sacramental pole. Definitely a Good Place (and I've just discovered, while Googling it for this post, that a friend's partner is on the staff there - lucky man!)
4) If I could sing a dream duet it would be with Ian Bostridge. Though I'm not sure I'd be able to make any sound at all, were he in the vicinity.
5) If I could sing on a TV or radio show, it would be...I honestly don't know the answer to this. There isn't an obvious show-case for the sort of singing I'd be likely to be doing...Perhaps I'll settle for one day precenting somewhere whose choir broadcasts on R3's Choral Evensong - assuming that this actually survives.
OK...having indulged in this cheerfully pointless activity, it's back to Genesis 1 and an ecology sermon. Unless, of course, I paint the dog's toe-nails...or rearrange the sock drawer...or...
Oddly uninviting
For some reason I feel rather less than enthusiastic about my customary mode of transport today. On normal days, my bike is blue with a black saddle, and the basket has space for the eclectic essentials of a morning out and about in Ch Kings. Today, it is as you see white all over, and the basket is full to the brim with snow. Perhaps I'll just stay in, till I postively have to go somewhere. I do need to get to Oxford in a couple of hours (no problem once I've got out of Privet Drive, I'm sure, though there's more snow falling as I type) and, more seriously, Hugger Steward is due to leave Burford at 4.00 am tomorrow for a flight from Heathrow to Berlin. (A level History trip to places of WW2 significance, including Krakow, lucky boy)I fear that the roads will be really good fun by then if this weather continues...
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Not all suburbia
School was cancelled for my boys today, so before Morning Prayer the Dufflepud the dogs and I went on a wonderful walk up through the woods that overlook Ch Kings. We were the first people about and it was quite breathtaking...though poor Mufti, the Australian terrier, is honestly too low-slung to cope very well with deep snow, and was soon shackled by huge snow-balls round all 4 paws and hanging from her tummy as well. She kept going manfully for a long while, until she couldn't actually move at all - at which point she lay down, almost disappearing completely in the drifts.All in all, it was a wonderful way to begin the day. It's not often that I actually see the beauty right on the doorstep. Having the outlines of trees and hedges muffled by snow somehow makes them more real. Now, though, the morning's gleaming whiteness has been reduced to grubby slush in most places, and a normal life of hospital visits, synod meetings and overdue sermon prep beckons again.
Keeping up with the Joneses in Privet Drive
I am with difficulty refraining from singing "There's no business like snow-business" as I go upon my merry way!
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
School Run
-6 degrees when the boys and I got into the car this morning...The drive over to Burford was utterly stunning in its deep-frozen beauty. Can't believe that once upon a time my "school run" would have involved the stop-start nightmare of London's South Circular.
It took me a while to get home this morning, as I had to keep stopping to take photos. A few more on flickr.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Dreams and realities
I’ve just received a slightly scary package through the post…the assorted paperwork I need to complete (and ask others to complete about me) before my first ever official Ministerial Review.
As I’ve only been ordained 3 years, the first question or two are relatively easy
The most significant experiences in my ministry over the past 3 years?
That would be my ordination and first Eucharist, for sure!
Have I managed to achieve the objectives identified in my last ministerial review? What review??
Then I remembered that, during our very last residential at vicar-school, we were told to settle down and dream dreams about where our ministry might be in 3 years time...The exercise was labelled "The Miracle Question".
Atypically, I knew where to find my thoughts…and was really interested in what I’d written. I’m not in any way saying “Wow, look at me…super-priest has met her personal goals” but I was struck by the similarities between what I’d dared to hope for and where I feel ministry really is right now. I suspect this says more about my self-knowledge in terms of what I might reasonably expect to do/be than about any real or imagined success criteria…Still quite interesting, though. Overall, there is a pretty good match of "achievements" (to my amazement, I’d actually thought I might do a spiritual direction course- had totally forgotten about that) – with, of course, one or two heroic failures.
For example, whatever happened to the alt worship that I was hoping to see as a regular part of my ministry?
And the regular writing?? Maybe this blog is it,- but perhaps I should try and do something more focussed....or revisit the question of an M Phil (Help! I need a topic…aaarghhh)
Church re-ordering isn’t really something I have any control over. No surprises that it hasn’t been achieved yet – for somewhere like St M’s, this is HUGE.
But the things that I really envisgaged mattering most…Presiding at the Eucharist, work with pre-school and school-aged children, funerals…those truly are the places that I feel most at home.
I’m intrigued that I thought I’d need to “learn to relate to those on the fringes of the community”. Here in CK, the fringes are often where I feel most comfortable…
I had no idea about the real pressure points for me….Time management when there is no fixed timetable…Boundaries of all sorts…those are the things that bring me up short again and again.
Perhaps, after all, this ministerial review won't be too daunting at least in the preparation. Always assuming, of course, that I actually get the paperwork done! If I manage that in good time for the deadline, I think I'll have to award myself the Curate's Medal of Extraordinary Achievement...it'll be a first.
As I’ve only been ordained 3 years, the first question or two are relatively easy
The most significant experiences in my ministry over the past 3 years?
That would be my ordination and first Eucharist, for sure!
Have I managed to achieve the objectives identified in my last ministerial review? What review??
Then I remembered that, during our very last residential at vicar-school, we were told to settle down and dream dreams about where our ministry might be in 3 years time...The exercise was labelled "The Miracle Question".
Atypically, I knew where to find my thoughts…and was really interested in what I’d written. I’m not in any way saying “Wow, look at me…super-priest has met her personal goals” but I was struck by the similarities between what I’d dared to hope for and where I feel ministry really is right now. I suspect this says more about my self-knowledge in terms of what I might reasonably expect to do/be than about any real or imagined success criteria…Still quite interesting, though. Overall, there is a pretty good match of "achievements" (to my amazement, I’d actually thought I might do a spiritual direction course- had totally forgotten about that) – with, of course, one or two heroic failures.
For example, whatever happened to the alt worship that I was hoping to see as a regular part of my ministry?
And the regular writing?? Maybe this blog is it,- but perhaps I should try and do something more focussed....or revisit the question of an M Phil (Help! I need a topic…aaarghhh)
Church re-ordering isn’t really something I have any control over. No surprises that it hasn’t been achieved yet – for somewhere like St M’s, this is HUGE.
But the things that I really envisgaged mattering most…Presiding at the Eucharist, work with pre-school and school-aged children, funerals…those truly are the places that I feel most at home.
I’m intrigued that I thought I’d need to “learn to relate to those on the fringes of the community”. Here in CK, the fringes are often where I feel most comfortable…
I had no idea about the real pressure points for me….Time management when there is no fixed timetable…Boundaries of all sorts…those are the things that bring me up short again and again.
Perhaps, after all, this ministerial review won't be too daunting at least in the preparation. Always assuming, of course, that I actually get the paperwork done! If I manage that in good time for the deadline, I think I'll have to award myself the Curate's Medal of Extraordinary Achievement...it'll be a first.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Theology by love-heart
Marcella has already remarked on the broad range of theology to be found in a packet of love-hearts...and having just returned home from Open House I can only agree with her.Our theme for this afternoon, following the Lectionary, was "Catch!" - so we had a fair bit of happy mayhem involving acting out the miraculous catch, and entangling as many children as possible in a net before sending them off to share the message they'd been given with everyone else in church.
Later on, they were given a tangible reminder of the message in the form of love-hearts...Yes, it's tacky. Yes, eating more than a couple can definitely make you feel rather sick...but nonetheless, there's great scope here for a station in the next St Mary's labyrinth.
Messages from God included
"Be Mine""All Mine" "I Love You" "Real Love" "Forever" and , delightfully, "Let's dance"....while one response at least echoed this morning's reading from Isaiah "Send me".
So next time I'm stuck for a sermon, I might just pull a random collection of love hearts out of a packet and see where they take me. Meanwhile, there are several people I need to communicate with...choose a sweet, go on,- there's
"Best Mate" "Bless You" "Hug Me" "You Angel" "Love you"...
Explanatory Note
Since my older son seems confused, it's possible one or two others are equally at a loss...so here goes. For the foreseeable future, these are the essential facts about the GoodinParts family.
We live at Privet Drive, in a house provided by the diocese of Gloucester, because I, Mummy GoodinParts, am more commonly known as The Curate.
I'm married to Longsuffering Clockmaker, and we have 3 children
We live at Privet Drive, in a house provided by the diocese of Gloucester, because I, Mummy GoodinParts, am more commonly known as The Curate.
I'm married to Longsuffering Clockmaker, and we have 3 children
- Hattie Gandhi, in her first year of reading English at Cardiff University,
- Hugger Steward, who currently has more hair than I've had hot dinners, and is in his A level year at school, and
- the Dufflepud, his younger brother.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
A dufflepud is born!
Youngest son has long had an ambition to try his hand at coracling,- inspired in part by early identification with Reepicheep the mouse. and by a happy chance one of my very favourite people on the planet has in her possession a coracle. Add to this mixture two clergy without sermons to preach tomorrow, a dry Saturday and a duck-weed covered stretch of canal and a very happy morning is the result. Amazingly, the change of clothes we'd brought with us went home untouched...This child is far more balanced in every respect than his mother!
As a means of travel, coracling makes even narrow-boating seem speedy,- so we marched up and down the towpath a bit in an effort to keep warm,while he paddled along. Lots to see ...I'm almost regretting not joining in the Project 365 as I find outings with Biggles the camera oddly addictive. I've never been a visual person, but knowing that mistakes cost nothing, I'm getting bolder by the minute.
Mind you, as J and the coracle drifted away from the shore, he looked not so much like Reepicheep as some other characters from The Voyage of the Dawn Treader...the newly visible monopod dwarves, the Dufflepuds. In fact, from henceforth I propose to give no 2 son a new nom- de-blog...the Dufflepud.
Friday, February 02, 2007
Candlemas
Lovely Assembly this morning at the infants' school.
We talked about how the star that had been on the church tower since Christmas no longer shone there today, and carefully packed away my Asian crib.
I told them the story of the Presentation, letting them work out for themselves why candles are the symbol for today, and what we might really mean by describing Jesus as a light for people everywhere.
Then we turned the hall lights off, lighting one large "Jesus candle" and prepared to put it away as well, leaving the hall in darkness.
We stopped just in time, to allow a member of each class to light a tea light from the big flame first, and the children stood, holding their lights for a moment of intense silence before we prayed.
Very simple.
Very obvious.
But holy, for all that.
Wild Goose Publications, The Iona Community.
We talked about how the star that had been on the church tower since Christmas no longer shone there today, and carefully packed away my Asian crib.
I told them the story of the Presentation, letting them work out for themselves why candles are the symbol for today, and what we might really mean by describing Jesus as a light for people everywhere.
Then we turned the hall lights off, lighting one large "Jesus candle" and prepared to put it away as well, leaving the hall in darkness.
We stopped just in time, to allow a member of each class to light a tea light from the big flame first, and the children stood, holding their lights for a moment of intense silence before we prayed.
Very simple.
Very obvious.
But holy, for all that.
Starmaker God,
Lightener of the world;
bless us and warm us
into life and loving.
Bring us to the light of Jesus
all the length and breadth
of our nights and days.
Ruth Burgess: A Book of Blessings and how to write your ownLightener of the world;
bless us and warm us
into life and loving.
Bring us to the light of Jesus
all the length and breadth
of our nights and days.
Wild Goose Publications, The Iona Community.
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